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David Brown's Free Play | Sumo Warriors, Belief Blobs and the Ultimate Death Machine

David Brown
Browser games, Free Play, Freeware, Hungry Sumo, PC games, UFOwned, zOMT

David Brown's Free Play | Sumo Warriors, Belief Blobs and the Ultimate Death Machine

We've had inflatable Japanese characters on these pages before, and it seems the tradition of stuffing your avatar's face for profit is a popular one. Instead of a heroic cat bouncing down a Peggle-esque level, this time we've got a sumo wrestler who needs a bit of nourishment before he can defeat his opponent.

Hungry Sumo is very simple. Hover the mouse over your gluttonous gladiator and he'll expand, chowing down on the fattening substance in his rice bowl. Perhaps it's helium.

Combat is initiated merely by colliding with an opponent, and the trick is to stop inflating your sumo before this occurs. If you are feeding him when he makes contact, he'll pop like a rice-filled balloon, although sadly there's no animation of his entrails smearing the level as they fly from his distended body.

Sometimes one of the enemies will turn into a friendly sumo, although how close this is to the official rules of sumo wrestling, we don't know. Likewise, if you have more than one sumo on your team, they can be converted if they are being filled with food or if they hit an enemy who's bigger than them.

David Brown's Free Play | Sumo Warriors, Belief Blobs and the Ultimate Death Machine

As I had to write this column while waiting for my wife to finish teaching a load of kids Mandarin, I had to use a touchpad to play the game, which naturally makes it more challenging than if you were to use a proper mouse. Otherwise, it's pretty easy to keep your inflatable army together.

Eventually a grey statue appears, which can't be damaged but can still convert your sumos. If they turn grey, they can't be changed back, so watch out for that.

It's a fairly ridiculous game and not the sort of thing you want a room full of children to see you playing. However, it is vaguely diverting and a good laugh for said kids, even if they really should be concentrating on learning Chinese.

zOMT isn't any less silly, come as it does from Adult Swim, but it does at least look less so from a distance. It's a side-scrolling tower defence game with some interesting cartoon visuals, comprising 15 levels of surprisingly tough strategy challenge.

Operating in a similar way to Plants vs Zombies, you are a god that needs worshippers to produce green balls of 'belief' to fund your building programme (like the sunflowers producing sun in PvZ).

You can have up to six fanatics worshipping you at any one time, but they're weak and need protection, for without devotees, no deity can exist. Once you've collected belief blobs, you can purchase more worshippers or erect defences to stop heathens defiling your statue and murdering your fanatics.

The backbone of your defence force will be the grunt, at least at first. Cheap to buy, they'll provide an affordable solution to basic attacks on the early levels, but obviously you'll be wanting to get some more powerful units quick. Especially as you'll soon realise that your grunts will be defeated one-on-one by even the weakest enemy.

David Brown's Free Play | Sumo Warriors, Belief Blobs and the Ultimate Death Machine

Fortunately, you get some quite soon, like bouncy clouds to repel enemy catapults. There might only be 15 levels, but there's a reasonable amount of depth here, and fans of PvZ will lap it up. There's also potential for a proper paid-for game if the developers were to consider going in that direction.

Finally, UFOwned completes our round-up of the ridiculous this week. Aliens have come to a heavily pixellated, basic-looking Earth, looking to retaliate for a perceived attack that never actually happened.

You play as the aliens, attempting to eliminate the human 'threat' by using the arrow keys to move, C to fire a laser and Space to use a beam weapon, which sucks humans up into your space ship.

There's also an 'epic' weapon you can use to defeat the aliens, which you can charge by completing tasks, namely Gatherer, Hunter, Killer and Destructor. The first simply involves beaming up a specific human, while completing a Hunter task means eliminating a vehicle or sturdy target.

Killer targets are smaller and more fleshy, while Destructor are the hardest, asking you to take out houses or structures. Basically, just rain death down on the hapless humans below.

David Brown's Free Play | Sumo Warriors, Belief Blobs and the Ultimate Death Machine

But they aren't as defenceless as you might first think. Eventually, they get a bit cheesed off with you levelling their buildings and slaughtering their cats. That's when they bring in the tanks and soldiers, who begin to fire back at your surprisingly weak craft. You've got 5 lives in total and it's quite easy to fail to notice them taking pot shots at you, chipping away at your lives while you cackle as a tower block starts to burn.

When you finally die, you get a rank. Mine was Ultimate Death Machine, although I didn't quite feel like that until I got the fully upgraded lasers and beams. To be honest, most of the time it was a bit of a muddle with very little structure to the play, but it was decent fun watching the cats die. If you hate felines, this is the game for you. Also, humans.

Add a comment 1 comment
Neil88  Aug. 29, 2012 at 15:57

thank you for the article, David.
very interesting and unusual actually!
the picture of a Japanese guy is amusing


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