It's been a tough, tough weekend for your beleaguered, malnourished correspondent, which is why this column is later than usual. To make up for it, a handful of rather unusual games have been unearthed for you to frown, puzzle and scratch your scalp bloody over.
Sugar, Sugar isn't a cover of the Archies' “greatest” hit, it's a game about making piles of the sweet white stuff go into the appropriate containers. Controls are simple – use the mouse to draw lines which can direct the flow of the sugar.
As you progress, you'll need to get different colours into specific mugs, but generally it's pretty easy. If you do get into trouble, like when you're writing an article about the game and you notice the sugar's started pouring without you realising, there's a reset level button.
Gravity can also be flipped if necessary as well. All in all, it's quite good fun for a simplistic puzzler, but it won't hold your attention for too long. Unless you really, really love sugar a lot. It's quite a nice touch how the sugar rests on the instructions if you let it, though.
Shit Bit follows a similar pixellated theme, except it's cruder and you wouldn't any of these dots in your cuppa.
The goal is merely survival. As a toilet-dwelling micro-poo (really, not joking) you've got to protect yourself from the oncoming flush of death by guarding yourself from the onrushing water that'll come from any of the four sides of the screen.
If a molecule of water touches you, you die, so it's important to barricade yourself in on all sides or all on one or two sides and hope for the best. Tap the up arrow key to 'lay' a blob of excrement or just let yourself drift down the bowl.
It's quite tough to judge just whether you'll be safe or not, so it's kind of trial and error to an extent. However, practice gives you the experience to know just what type of structure gives you the best chance of success.
The question is whether you'll bother playing it that long, which is probably a question answered in the negative. It's unforgiving and limited, but it does involve the word poo, so if you're of a childish bent, perhaps that alone will give you reason to play it for more than a few minutes.
Second Person Shooter Zato has a potentially intriguing concept behind it, that you control the action not from the traditional perspectives of either through-the-eyes or outside-the-body (1st and 3rd persons) but from the eyes of another. That is, from your enemy's viewpoint.
In practice, the concept does actually work, surprisingly. Knowing your character can't move, and that you can see other enemies closing in on him, makes it quite a tense affair. You've only got limited ammunition too, so it's not just a blast and hope affair.
As you progress, you can be fighting four enemies at once, some falling from the sky to land right next to you, requiring quick reactions. Essentially, this is a must-play freeware game, one of the most highly recommended titles seen so far on these pages.
Finally this week, something a little more topical. What would you do to help the cause of the Libyan revolutionaries? Get some musicians together to record a benefit album? Organise rallies outside the Libyan embassy in your country's capital?
Markus Richert did neither of those things, instead creating a bemusing 'protest' game to showcase his thoughts on North African democratic change in the Libyan Hamburger Recipe.
Actually, it's not really a game at all. Unless you count pushing the down arrow a few times then the up arrow once as gameplay. It's just a joke really.
The first level sees you grind Gaddafi into a hamburger paste, which you then form into a delicious patty, frying it and then tossing it onto a tempting looking North African dish of couscous and a side salad. And with the mad dictator's hat plopping delicately onto the fried meat, that'll be your lot for this week.