Time-wasting is an art and we like art here at Dealspwn. Not the modern kind with the blank canvas with a line cut into it being sold for millions of pounds. That's not art, that's a slip with a scalpel and then someone with too much money trying to look clever. We like the proper art, with pencils, drawing, oil paint and nudes being caressed by cherubs.
We also like not doing very much and avoiding work at all costs. Plus the internet, being that we're manning one of its multitudinous outposts here. Why not combine both of those things then? By jingo, that's just what gaming trio Alex Leone, David Nufer and David Truong have done in Katamari Hack.
If you've ever played the utterly insane PlayStation games where you use a ball to roll up all the items in an area, this is the same thing, just using your browser's contents instead of tables and chairs. You could, of course, go to Ikea's website and roll up all the furniture there for an authentic Katamari experience, though.
Anyway, it works like this: go to the link above, bookmark it, then traverse the digital ether and find something called a website. Hit that link you just bookmarked and faster than Will Smith can shake the room, you'll be screen-hoovering, only small letters and images being attracted to you at first, but with momentum comes greater pulling power. It's like the Lynx effect but in browser form.
Is it fun? For a very short time. Will you be playing it tomorrow? No, but it's perfect for wasting that little bit of time you have between the start of work and clocking off time. Which is kind of what a time-waster is meant to be. Note: it doesn't seem to wreck advertising, sadly.
Next out of the big indie biscuit barrel, selected from between the bourbons and the horrible shortbread, is Lame Castle, something that's been around for a while, but deserves a re-mentioning because the developers have been asked to produce a Serious Sam-inspired game in the run up to the big new SS3 release, whenever that is.
Available on those weird things people use on trains and in public places (mobile phones – Ed) for actual money, you could circumvent the need to pay for a good and/or service by merely hitting the link above and playing it for free. Remember not to then hit the Katamari Hack link afterwards or you might eat the game window!
Lame Castle is a “dash” game, claims the website. This means you don't control the character's movement, bar jumping and hitting. Slap the left mouse button or the space bar to jump, holding them down to jump higher or even clicking again to double jump, while also mashing A to attack or do a jumping boost attack in conjunction with the previous commands.
All the while, you'll be constantly moving from left to right, where you'll finally hit an inflatable castle which will be punctured by your lance and fly off into the air. There are only a handful of levels in the free version, though there is an Endless mode, which I really shouldn't need to explain at all, should I?
It's all very simple and easy to play, perfect for the greasy screened devices people bark into from time to time. It's also got chickens you can make squawk in it and a pink princess presenting your high score.
Finally, there's Antimatiere, a game about the world becoming flat and two-dimensional. You, as a 3D being, have to solve puzzles and explain why people and things are now all flat.
Done from a first-person perspective, you can click to 'capture' a texture and then click again to place it somewhere else. The now-2D people in each room will explain what you need to do, at least at first. After a couple of rooms, it'll open up and the puzzles become more sophisticated, with genuine mind benders later on.
While you might not care about the existentialist storyline, it's a damn fine puzzle game, and although the visuals are bland, they still work. In a grey fashion, anyway. Definitely worth a look.