Login | Signup

Why We Hate . . . BMX XXX

Author:
Matt Gardner
Category:
Features
Tags:
Acclaim Entertainment, AKA Acclaim, BMX XXX, Oh dear, Sports Games, Strippers, Why We Hate, Why We Love, Z-Axis

Why We Hate . . . BMX XXX

Doing this week's Tony Hawk's Pro Skater HD review got me thinking about some of the other extreme sports titles that have come and gone over the years. Some were great (SSX), other were ok (Shaun White's Snowboarding), and some were absolutely awful. Welcome, BMX XXX!

Buoyed by reaping the profits and cashing in on the burgeoning Xgames market with Dave Mirra's Freestyle BMX series, Acclaim wanted more. Sadly, though, rumour has it that the follow up was shaping up to be utter balls, and so, in an attempt to somehow salvage the nosediving product, reports suggest that the publisher made a decision to throw caution to the wind and transform the game into a raunchy sex comedy.

Why We Hate . . . BMX XXX

Developers, take note. This is generally a terrible idea. Especially in an industry that has been unfavourably associated with basements and masturbation. In a toss-up (Risky - Ed.) between making your game better and throwing in some tits, always go for the first option.

The thing is, Z-Axis had already delivered a string of solid BMX titles that sold pretty well on their own merits. Had they overreached? Had too many staffers left? Had they run out of steam, or money, or drive, or talent monkeys? Perhaps we'll never know. What we do know, is that they ended up shipping a game that allowed players to ogle FMV strippers jiggling up and down, and make topless models with squashed faces ride around on tiny bikes, alongside scripted jokes that would make the writers of the American Pie spinoffs cringe.

Why We Hate . . . BMX XXX

Cue banning in Australia, Sony wading in to demand cover-ups for the topless stunt merchants and their stripper brethren (yes, the game contains real-life strippers), and Dave Mirra actually suing Acclaim over abuse of likeness. The last point was later settled as it turned out that Mirra's name had been struck from the game, and his likeness hadn't been used at all in the game itself, nor its promotional material. After being tied to a handful of Z-Axis BMX titles published by Acclaim, one can understand his desire to distance himself as much as he could from the two-wheeled, nipple-tassled carnival of shame.

Rejected by NA retail chains, and outlawed completely down under, one might have hoped that we Europeans might have seen the funny side. But we didn't, the game bombed, and Acclaim filed for bankruptcy just over a year later after being sued by its own investors for misleading financial reports, a string of failed titles, and dubious business practices.

The moral of the story? Boobs won't save your game. Or its publisher.

Add a comment5 comments
jkhjkhjk  Jul. 22, 2012 at 14:26

Oh just go away. This is an old game and so it has a querk, your obviously using this game to get people to view your blog.

The cards are dealt

gmdlogan  Jul. 22, 2012 at 14:54

People never raced topless when i used to race!

Kopite211  Jul. 22, 2012 at 19:54

Oh just go away. This is an old game and so it has a querk, your obviously using this game to get people to view your blog.

The cards are dealt


What are you on about? Also your grammar is shoddy.

nmbnmbnm  Jul. 22, 2012 at 23:50

@jkhjkhjk: Congrats on being the first troll here in a while. I agree with Kopite, your grammar could use some work.

Ah Acclaim...you bunch of shady fools. Supposedly marketed to the over 18s, I'm not sure why anyone whose experience of sex goes beyond **** over the underwear section in Matalan would have bought this game.

Liking the variation on the usual Why We Love... by the way. Can the next Why We Hate be for the narrator in Naughty Beat please? Picked it up in a 3 for £20 bundle. I got ripped off :-(

DivideByZero  Jul. 23, 2012 at 07:54

I think Hurrakan and I should do the why we hate section... if there is something that both of us hate then it must be REALLY bad!

Personally I loved Dave Mirra BMX. It was a lot harder to play than Tony Hawk / Matt Hoffman games, but that meant great challenge and reward. Z-Axis, where did you go so wrong?

Trackbacks

Leave a Trackback from your own site

Email Address:

You don't need an account to comment. Just enter your email address. We'll keep it private.