I'm sure, to some, a game of bikini clad women slaying zombies sounds like the best idea ever and, well, fair play to them but unfortunately, so consumed with parading these supposedly sexy babes were the developers, that it seems they forgot to slot in a game. However if that is but a mild concern in your quest to watch pixelated chests heaving with the exertion of hacking at some re-animated corpses then it may interest you to know that Play are currently offering Onechanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayers for just £9.99 - nearly three pounds less than the next best price (£12.73 from The Hut).
Bikini Zombie Slayers is the Wii exclusive sequel to the XBox's atrocious Bikini Samurai Squad. It is a marked improvement from the original but then so is a slap in the belly with a salmon. To be fair I am not this game's target audience but frankly frustrated adolescent boys deserve more. The story is poor to the point that you are unlikely to have any clue what is going on beyond the fact that you're an angry girl with a fondness for swords and an aversion to zombies and clothes.
Sadly, the narrative is not the game's only failing; the gameplay is also painfully monotonous with a woeful combat system. Said combat is a very simple hack and slash affair, with little need to do anything but waggle the Wii remote around half-heartedly. On the other hand the game's special moves are unneccessarily awkward This does little to enliven the extremely linear levels which feel entirely interchangeable.
The combination of pneumatic women, zombies and gore ought to make for an exciting affair, if only in the most base of ways but somehow Onechanbara manages to miss even this easy target, leaving a game that is simply dull.
Thanks to andywedge at Hotukdeals!