Every Sunday, we'll be diving into the Dealspwn archives to bring you an article or review from yesteryear. This Valentine's Weekend, it's only fitting that we revisit our lost loves in an article originally published back 2011.
You might remember a couple of old faces!
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This Valentine's Day I only have eyes for a certain Drell mercenary. I have always been notoriously picky when it comes to matters of the heart but any human foolhardy enough to wish to woo this childish daydreamer now has an even more monumental task on his hands. For what mere mortal could compare to this handsome and exotic alien with the strength, skill, bravery and rapier mind of an assassin but the heart and soul of a tortured poet? Sure he is riddled by guilt and the angstiest of existential angst but he more than makes up for it with his fascinating, mysterious past, gentle manner and quiet capability.Click here to read more...
Valentine's Day is a beautiful thing. Whether you're heading out on a first date, celebrating years of happiness or just looking for that special someone, it's a day of careful planning, sweeping romantic gestures and love in its
most ridiculously expensive purest form.
So stuff all that nonsense, because PlayStation Plus multiplayer is free for all this weekend and there's plenty of games to play.*
More than likely your significant other or date will be totally up for this plan. Gaming is awesome. We all know it. But just in case they need a little extra convincing, here are some great games that will bring you closer together and make for a truly special Valentine's Day. At least, that's what you'll tell them, seeing as you clearly haven't sorted anything out yet and there's only one day to go. It'll be our little secret.
*Dealspwn accepts no responsibility for any failed relationships as a result of this course of action. Dealspwn does not guarantee that any bacon will be saved. Who needs 'em? They weren't good enough for you anyway. We love ya.
Dying Light? Seriously?!
A hectic and terrifying zombie-infested sandbox might not seem like a great mood-setter, but you'd be surprised. Not only will the cooperative exploration and combat bring you closer together in ways you'd never thought possible, but you'll also need to snuggle into safe zones for warmth and shelter. Who knows what might happen... okay, lookit, guys and girls, this is the best excuse we can come up with.
It'll work. Trust us.
Ah, now Portal 2 is altogether more wholesome. Adorable robots? Check. Close cooperation that makes you work together and cherish each other? Check.
Cake? Erm, don't count on it.Click here to read more...
Well, here goes nothing.
It's a day of love, a day to celebrate romance and sensuality in all its forms, so once again we've got to post something vaguely related to this Hallmark holiday. We've done heartfelt anecdotes, top tens, present lists and even bromances... but frankly, it's high time we gave the people what they really want.
Cleavage. Massive, heaving, irresistible cleavage.
So, without further ado, here's the most epic cleavage in gaming history alongside some utterly incredible close-up shots. Happy Valentine's Day, you lucky mucky people...
Click here to reveal all...
Happy VD everybody! Valentine's Day, that is, not the...erm...other thing. As we discovered earlier in the week, this industry has not exactly covered itself in glory at times when it comes to coupling, with forced romantic storylines often proving alienating, immersion-breaking, and sometimes downright disturbing (*cough* Sonic!). But interactive entertainment has also offered us some absolutely fantastic moments of such romantic bliss that it almost brings a tear to the eye just reminiscing.
So we gathered up the team and put together a little list of our favourite romantic moments in video games...
If you heard the recent PWNCAST in which we discussed romance in games, you would have already seen my choice coming a mile off, but for those of you who didn’t listen (BOO-urns to you) I will helpfully clarify my most touching moment for you - Jack finally opening up to Shepard in Mass Effect 2.
Starting out as possibly the angriest person in the galaxy (with good reason) Jack slowly began to confide in my Shepard over the course of the game, leading to me helping her destroy her childhood memories with a nuke (which I think you’ll agree is one hell of a first date.) Slowly getting to know the girl who had faced the worst the galaxy could dish out her entire life, topped off with her frequent use of profanity, provided what I felt was some the best storytelling in the game. However, the scene that took place before the suicide mission, when Jack turns up in Shepard’s cabin, is the one that gets me every time.
With her emotions finally on show, the psychotic biotic had finally found something worth taking a risk on, and I got to see Jack in a moment of peace and happiness. The end result of not giving up on her was a tender scene between two people who had been to hell and back, and because I was projecting my own feelings through my version of Shepard it made the moment resonate even more.
Sure, she would end up punching me in Mass Effect 3 upon our reunion, but it was worth it. Jack was always worth it.Click here to read more...
Roses are rubbish. Choccies are cliché. This is the 21st century, people, and the world of gaming has provided us with infinitely more meaningful presents to proffer to our significant others on this Hallmark holiday.
That being said, the course of true love never did run smooth... and it's very easy to get things apocalyptically wrong. Therefore, as Dealspwn's resident doctor of lurve (my diploma is in the post, shut up), it's my duty to sum up the very best and worst gaming gifts out there. There's no need to thank me. It's my job. It's what I do. Just knowing that I've brought a little more love into the world is reward enough.
A hardcore strategy game might seem like a bizarre choice for a romantic present, but you'd be dead wrong. Each purchase gives you two codes, so in between breathlessly fragging each other (read that again, you sick puppy), you can stay connected and swap sweet nothings in an exclusive social network.
What's more, you can always pretend that you let your partner win for extra brownie points... even though they kicked your arse fair and square.Click here to read our (slightly risqué) Valentines Day special >>
Having already announced a cross-game partnership between Big Huge Games' Reckoning: Kingdoms of Amalur where exclusive armor and weaponry can be earned in either title via their respective demos, Bioware have now finally lifted the lid on when said Mass Effect 3 demo will be available. But you might want to cancel that romantic boat ride, as it's set to release on February the 14th. That's right; Valentine's Day.Click here to read more...
Mates. Buds. Compadres. Amigos.
Videogames have taken a stab at true love, but when it comes right down to it, there's no deeper connection than two best mates who look out for each other through thick and thin. Allow me, therefore, to take you through ten of the greatest Bromance stories ever told.
Conventional logic dictates that this pair should be the deadliest of enemies, but nothing could be further from the truth. Every time Mario needs some more disposable income or some time away from the missus, Bowser's always happy to hook him up with a princess kidnapping and go through the motions. In an awesome display of taking one for the team, Mario was also willing to go deep inside the digestive tract of his erstwhile foe to save the world... which is quite frankly further than even the tightest of bros are willing to go. Even on a stag night.
When Commander Shepard is forced to go off the books and recruit a crack team of surly ne'er-do-wells to save the universe, there's one Turian that he knows that he can rely on time and time again. Garrus always has his back. Whether he's doling out sage advice or devastating sniper cover fire, this is one partnership that survived two games and will hopefully make it into the third.
This is a classic example of a budding bromance that was cruelly cut short. It took a .44 magnum round and several cans of petrol to drag these two apart, even after the steadfast Ghost heroically dragged his comrade in arms out of a deadly firefight and was pivotal in securing each and every objective that Task Force 141 threw at them.
A tragic end to a solid bromance that was forged- and severed- by fire.Click here to keep reading, bro!
Ignore the cynicism, it's Valentine's Weekend! Instead of 'Why We Love...', this week it's more of a 'Who We Love...' to get into the spirit of things. With that in mind, a few members of the team took the opportunity to show the world how they feel...
This Valentine's Day I only have eyes for a certain Drell mercenary. I have always been notoriously picky when it comes to matters of the heart but any human foolhardy enough to wish to woo this childish daydreamer now has an even more monumental task on his hands. For what mere mortal could compare to this handsome and exotic alien with the strength, skill, bravery and rapier mind of an assassin but the heart and soul of a tortured poet? Sure he is riddled by guilt and the angstiest of existential angst but he more than makes up for it with his fascinating, mysterious past, gentle manner and quiet capability.
We could go to a quiet little bar somewhere in the far flung reaches of the galaxy and he could call me "Siha" in that achingly melodic voice. And later, from our cosy little space ship (shhh, in this fantasy he's not dying ok?!) we could look back on that magical first Valentine's night and he could recall it exactly. How full the moons were, the way their light played upon my hair, how I squealed when he noticed a rare Kahjian bug nestled in it, how he told a slightly risqué turian joke and made me laugh until my ice brandy shot out of my nose... Every little detail. Every. single. tiny. little thing.
On second thoughts, I wonder whether Link is still available...
Love is the one thing that games often fail to grasp terribly well, and the less said about sometime associate Sex the better (yes BioWare, I'm looking at you). But there are some games that do manage to pull off relationships so engrossing that we keep coming back time and time again. Therefore, with Valentine's Day coming up it's time to take a look at some of gaming's sweetest couples. Some of them work, some of them are doomed more than UAC experiments on Mars, some are one-sided, some are simply part of a greater love triangle, or square, or dodecahedron, but they're all memorable. And they're all heartwarming...well, most of them anyway. You may encounter a few MASSIVE SPOILERS just so you know.
Naughty Dog are pretty damn good at everything really, and so creating not only a believable romantic sub-plot for Mr. Drake, but a good romantic sub-plot should come as no surprise. Uncharted and its sequel showed that being a good couple is all about teamwork. Elena's hot, she's game for a spot of witty banter, and she has no hesitation in occasionally saving Drake's life by whipping out a firearm and bustin' caps. Never hurts to have some of the best voice actors in the business either.